1 Afraid To Lose You

POV Steve

And I who thought I couldn't fall in love again was surprised once again by fate. I fell in love with my best friend and work partner, but she was much more than that, she was also my family. Feeling all this affection and love for her scared me sometimes, I never thought it was possible to love a person so much until I met her. Since we knew each other, something changed inside of me, I never gave importance, I never considered that before. She was, she's my best friend and I couldn't do this to her, after all, it could work very well or very wrong and if it went wrong... I couldn't lose her, not now, but when I most need her, not when we most need each other because we are the only family that we have and I couldn't risk.

We were in Wakanda a few days after we come home, we knew about the threat to the universe and Thanos, everyone left are here, T'Challa had given us shelter and all the differences before had been resolved.

I was in my room, most precisely at the balcony watching the city, Wakanda was without doubts a rare jewel, it was simply amazing. I was so distracted that I didn't miss until now that someone else had entered here, I knew only when she was a few meters of me, I smelled her perfume, the same that got me drunk every time she was too close. I took a deep breath and I continue what I was doing because if I turned around, I knew that I would be face to face with her and at this point, I wasn't sure if I could control myself.

— Ste... — she hugged me from behind and all my body shuddered for a moment, it had been a while since something had changed between us, but I wasn't sure and because of this I never spoke or did anything as afraid it was something in my head.

— Nat... — she squeezed me a little and finally, I get the courage to turn around and faced her. — It's everything okay?

— Yeah... I mean, I don't know. — sighed and I caressed your face.

— You're worried, aren't you? — she nodded.

— Thanos... From what Bruce said, he's something that we never faced, I don't know what will happen Ste. We don't know anything about Thor, probably he's dead, Tony is gone too and we can't find Clint either.

— We're gonna figured out Nat, I never saw you like this way, there's something more?

— It's because I just feel that maybe we lose this time...

— Hey, try to think positive, ok? It will be alright.

— I'm trying, but yes, you're all right. There's something else...

— What is it?

— Thanos is close, maybe this is our last night on Earth, we have no way of knowing... And if something happens, I know that I'll go to regret not saying it.

— Saying what?

— Steve, I love you.

— Finally!!

— What? What you mean finally?

— I thought that you will never say that, you know, we're friends for so long and I know that I'm important to you, but you never said. Look, we needed the near end of the world for you to say.

— What? No that's not it. — rolled her eyes. — Are you idiot like this or you pretend?

— What? — I couldn't say anything else, because she pulled me and kissed me, ok, I wasn't delirious, Natasha loved me? Did she feel the same as me? I couldn't think of anything but return the kiss, and we only parted when the air failed.

— Do I need to draw or? — joke staring at me with a raised eyebrow.

— Sorry, I got nervous.

— Really? Don't tell me? — mocked.

— I got nervous because I feel the same, I love you Natasha Romanoff and I love it for a long time. — smile caressing your face.

— Why did you never say anything?

— I was scared, we're family and you're my best friend, you are one of the most important people to me and I was afraid of losing you.

— You will never lose me, did you hear me, soldier? — smiled and hugged me, reciprocates the hug taking her off the floor which made her laugh. — How long? — she pulled back a little as I set her down and stared at me wondering what made me embarrassed, yes, even after all this time, I can still be embarrassed around her.

— Well...

— How long Steve?

— Since Ultron... — she looked surprised and she smiled at me. — And you?

— Well... — smile staring at you. — Don't look at me like that.

— What? You look at me the same way and when I do this to you do you get embarrassed? Hold on... Are you ashamed? Really? Ok, I didn't see this coming. — I laughed and she stared at me looking furious

— Rogers, if you tell this to somebody... You are a dead man!

— Okay, okay. — I raised my hands in surrender — But seriously... How long?

— Since the Civil War.

— Really?

— Why do you think I "rebelled"?

— Sense of knowing what is right? My friendship?

— Haha, you're funny. Both things, but it isn't just for that.

— Good to know. — I smiled.

— Look... We don't know what is going to happen, Thanos can arrive any moment tomorrow. So... Can I stay here?

— And what makes you think that I'll let you get out of here?

— Look at this, looks you're not so boring after all. — she smiled.

— Nat... — I laughed kinda dull and she kissed me. — I waited for long to this.

— You know this could have been going on for a long time, right?

— You're guilty too. — I held her waist and pulled her closer.

— We can't go back to the past. But now I think we'd better enjoy it... — she smiled and pushed me again back to the bedroom.

— N-Natasha...

— What? I don't bite, only if you want. — we laughed and I approached her kissing her. — This is better...

I wouldn't know describe how much this night meant for us, but I know we can pass all the love we felt for each other, every touch, every kiss or word uttered, passed a little of love and affection that we had to each other.

Separated for years, but at the same time we've always been connected, Natasha always will be with me and I always be with her, I was more optimistic than never. I would fight and fight a lot, for her and our family. I would do anything to keep her safe, to keep them safe, whatever it takes.

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